Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Especial Bumper Stickers

O Mundo Lego orgulha-se de vos proporcionar uma viagem ao fantástico mundo dos Bumper Stickers (em português: autoautocolantes).
Os famosos autocolantes que abrilhantam as traseiras das vossas viaturas já são uma Instituição e como poderão ver nas próximas linhas, estes revelam-se verdadeiros espelhos da sociedade contemporânea (alguns literalmente).
Infelizmente os Bumper Stickers que deram à cultura do “cromo ao volante” um lugar ao sol, estão cada vez mais esquecidos com as novas gerações em busca da tribal mais apetecível e do dragão que melhor combine com os neons.

Estão prontos? Apertem o cinto…





Bébé a Bordo

Sem duvida um clássico ainda em vigor nos nossos dias.
Teoricamente este símbolo serviria para apelar à cautela dos condutores, evidenciando o facto de que viajariam crianças no banco de trás da viatura, ou seja, aparentemente bater na traseira de um carro não tem problema desde que não viagem bebés no banco de trás.
No entanto, apesar da lógica deste sticker ser a mesma da do pessoal que despreza Dzr’t mas gosta de Expensive Soul, o “Bébé a Bordo” possui uma legião enorme de fieis seguidores, muitos dos quais nem filhos têm.
O símbolo de bebé a bordo continua a marcar presença por esse Portugal fora, sendo possivelmente o único bumpersticker a figurar em carros com menos de 20 anos, naquilo que mostra ser a derradeira manobra de mau gosto em viaturas.




Puto a fazer “gesto feio” com a unha pintada


Usado nas viaturas dos mais rebeldes, como escape às regras de uma sociedade opressora que impõe conceitos tão absurdos como o uso de cinto de segurança ou a proibição de conduzir sob o efeito de álcool. Este autocolante revela-se assim um verdadeira fuga da irreverência destes jovens condutores, fartos das normas sociais ,
que os obrigam a comer com talheres e a mudarem a sua roupa interior pelo menos 1 vez por semana.



Rádio Renascença

Reza a lenda que António Sala (mítica personalidade do movimento “Tv e rádio saudosista” e autor do famoso “Anedotas de Sala) andava por esse Portugal fora, a mandar parar carros. O felizardo que tivesse o autocolante com a mensagem “Rádio renascença é um espectáculo” recebia uma viatura novinha em folha.
Claramente um autocolante usado pelos mais necessitados que desciam baixo ao ponto de promover uma coisa que sabiam que era mentira.
É de questionar como estas pessoas conseguiam dormir à noite.




Bandeira Sulista


Na América todo o Redneck que se preze tem de ter esta bandeira na traseira da sua pickup. O Mundo Lego estima que 99,9% dos portadores deste Bumper Sticker não sabem o verdadeiro significado deste, achando apenas que é uma bandeirinha funky que mistura as cores de dois grandes clubes portugueses naquilo que pode ser entendido como uma espécie de trégua, transformando assim o seu portador, num arquétipo do “Peace & Love” português





Penélope
O Rei (ou melhor Rainha) de todos os Bumper Stickers. Muitos desconhecerão que a bela Penélope, com o seu look groovy dos anos 60, é o logótipo de uma famosa discoteca em Espanha, o que não a impediu de alcançar o estatuto mitológico, tornando as viaturas portadoras de tal autocolante em algo “larger than life”.


E ainda:

Seria possível continuar esta análise com um “tour de force” infindável de autocolantes. Desde os autocolantes retro metalizados, passando pelos símbolos clubisticos até aos “Espero não te conhecer por acidente”, o mundo dos bumperstickers promete-nos ainda muitos anos de autentica cultura pop.
De destacar o clássico autocolante com um 80, usado no passado para indicar que o condutor do veículo teria tirado a carta à pouco tempo, promovendo assim o suposto ideial de um veículo por pessoa, numa tentativa de aumentar o transito nas estradas como forma a mostrar o avanço tecnológico da nação.

Cláudius, o vidente, ainda hoje exibe orgulhosamente um 80 na parte de trás da sua viatura, indicando segundo o próprio que nunca se desloca a menos de 180 Km/h dentro da cidade. Quando o Mundo Lego questionou se esta era a única razão pela qual Cláudius mantinha o número na traseira do seu bólide este analisou:
- Reparai o que acontece quando lhe subtraímos 11…

148 comments:

Igner,the Geeklord said...

Caras, continuo a tentar fazer pressão para que publiquem um artigo sobre os caça-cigarros, uma espécie de mocidade portuguesa anti tabaco

D. said...

faltam os belos "micaela a bordo", os autocolantes do bebé com o nome personalizado... uma falha, uma falha...

Anonymous said...

Meu caro, reparai mais atentamente: há cerca de dois anos que o meu bólide - digo, viatura - não exibe essa autolante que lhe prestava mais 15 cv em arranque e 25 cv em velocidade de ponta. A minha vida sexual, desde que retirei esse auto-autocolante nunca mais foi da mesma actividade insistentemente horária. Ou foi do autocolante ou foi porque as mães dos amigos começaram a falecer. Cumprimentos em V, por essa estrada fora.

Anonymous said...

os autocolantes perderam a piada há já algum tempo! afinal, depois de aparecerem os famosos smarts patrocinados por discotecas azeiteiras qual é o bebe a bordo que resiste? o forfour do rivers só perde contra o autocarro "Act" da gondomarense

Rebel__Rebel said...

Um bumpersticker da penelope custa apenas 2€. eu estive com um na mão e não comprei ... Shame on me :(

Anonymous said...

dizem que a radio renascença te paga 2 euros (negociaveis atraves da linha do provedor do ouvinte) para colares o bumper da estação!

Anonymous said...

eheh opa akela cena dos gelados foi um kado po fatela ..mas esta dos autocolantes uiui...
ass:kika

andrezero said...

dude, o meu outro carro é um mercedes... o logo dos rolling stones... e os sinalecos de proibido/obrigatorio a dizer vida/morte !? hum!?

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